Have You Tried Yoga? – The Advice We Love to Hate (And How to Make It Useful)
When you're doing your best to live with chronic illness, casual advice can sometimes feel like a reminder of everything you're already carrying.
If you live with a chronic illness, chances are you’ve heard it before:
“Have you tried yoga?”
It’s one of those well-meaning but often frustrating pieces of unsolicited advice that seems to appear in almost every conversation about managing symptoms. For many of us, it triggers an immediate reaction—an internal (or external) eye roll, a sigh, or a mental checklist of all the reasons we’ve already considered, tried, or chosen against it.
But why does this suggestion strike such a nerve? And is there a way to respond that honours our experiences without letting frustration take over? Let’s explore why this advice can feel so uncomfortable—and how we can reclaim the conversation on our own terms.
Why "Have You Tried Yoga?" Feels So Annoying
🔹 It Can Feel Like a Dismissal of Our Struggles
When we open up about our pain or fatigue, we’re often seeking understanding—not a quick solution. Hearing “have you tried yoga?” can feel as if someone is implying, “The answer is simple; you just haven’t done the right thing.” It can unintentionally invalidate the complexity of what we are navigating.
🔹 It Can Make Us Feel Inadequate or Judged
Often, it’s not the suggestion itself that hurts, but the message it sends. Recommendations like “try yoga” can carry an underlying tone—however unintended—that we are somehow not doing enough, not trying hard enough, or missing something obvious. This can leave us feeling judged, inadequate, or as if we are to blame for our illness.
🔹 It Assumes We Haven’t Already Tried It
Many of us living with chronic illnesses have already explored yoga—or thoughtfully decided against it. Certain types of yoga can be beneficial, but others may exacerbate symptoms. When someone offers it as a new revelation, it can feel patronising rather than supportive.
🔹 It Oversimplifies a Complex Journey
Chronic illnesses are not problems that can be “fixed” with a single practice. They often require a nuanced balance of medical care, emotional resilience, lifestyle changes, and sometimes, just sheer patience. Oversimplifying this reality—however well-meant—can leave us feeling unseen and unheard.
How We Can Reframe Our Response
Instead of letting frustration steal our peace, we can choose to respond in ways that respect both our own experiences and the intent behind the comment.
💬 Recognise the Intent
Most people who offer advice genuinely want to help. They may be drawing on something that supported them or someone they know. Recognising their good intentions can sometimes soften our immediate reaction.
💬 Set Boundaries with Kindness
If you’re tired of the question, it’s perfectly okay to set a boundary. You might say,
“Thank you for thinking of me. I’ve explored yoga, but it’s not the right fit for me at the moment.”
This acknowledges their goodwill while affirming your own expertise over your body and choices.
💬 Stay Open (If You Choose To)
If you’re in a place of curiosity, you could gently redirect the conversation:
“I’m curious—what kind of yoga are you referring to?”
This turns unsolicited advice into an opportunity for exchange—on your terms, without pressure.
If You Choose to Explore Yoga—Your Way
Yoga isn’t a one-size-fits-all solution. If you're interested in exploring (or re-exploring) it, here are a few ways to do so mindfully:
🌿 Start Small and Gentle
Consider styles such as restorative yoga, chair yoga, or yin yoga—practices focused on slow movements, deep breathing, and relaxation, rather than strength or endurance.
🌿 Find an Instructor Who Understands Chronic Illness
Seek teachers who are trained in adaptive yoga or who have experience supporting people with chronic conditions. Online classes specifically designed for chronic pain, fatigue, or limited mobility can be excellent starting points.
🌿 Listen to Your Body Above All
Yoga should never be about pushing through pain. Respect your body’s signals—modify poses, rest when needed, and always prioritise comfort over performance.
🌿 Give Yourself Full Permission to Say No
If yoga doesn’t feel right for you, that’s completely valid. There are many ways to nurture your body, mind, and spirit that don’t involve downward dogs or sun salutations.
Final Reflections
Unsolicited advice can be difficult—not because practices like yoga are inherently bad, but because such advice can unintentionally make us feel unseen, inadequate, or misunderstood.
In these moments, we can choose to respond in ways that honour our journey, uphold our boundaries, and maintain our dignity. Whether that means setting a clear boundary, shifting the conversation, or exploring something new on our own terms, the choice—and the power—remain ours.
The next time someone asks, “Have you tried yoga?”—you’ll be ready to navigate the moment with grace and self-respect.
What’s your go-to response when someone offers unsolicited health advice?
We’d love to hear your thoughts—share in the comments below. 💬